~Eye-Magi-Nations Creations~

...& The Infinite Exploration of Love, Life & Self

~*~An Exploration in Pain & The Transcendance thereof~*~

 

 

The Angel of Darkness appeared today,

mixed feelings fall upon me

and within Loves Shadow I now stay.

Soothing strength

Darkening Calm

The Eye of OM within my palm.

Earth holds Her place,

the stomping ground,

into Her land the sorrow does pound.

Healing, soothing, vibrant Light...

She holds Her place with all of Her might.

Her Darkness  absorbs hurt & pain,

so strength & healing we can gain.

For within Her Black,

The soil of our Land,

The soul of the World,

She holds in Her Hand.

As Above...So Below,

The Moon smiles down,

Loves soft glow.

Lighting our way when all seems lost,

but we must go forth no matter the cost.

Surrounded by Loves calming Light,

we continue forward,

continue the fight.

Standing strong upon Her land,

and Her gentle Moonlight holding our hand.

~LiL~

2004 

Page Contents

What's pain got to do with it?

***

Pain discussion outline

***

Pain/Punishment

***

On Crying

***

What is Pain?

***

Softening Pain

***

What's Pain Got To Do WIth It?

    

 

      Pain has much to do with it! Pain IS part of Our Life, whether we like it or not...so we'd better learn to either like it or at the least...learn how to deal with it.  This has been the basis of the majority of my Path....Pain, and how to deal with it, work with it, embrace it and transform it. How to Heal from pain and how to Heal with pain......how to Transcend Pain...and mostly through the LOVE OF SELF.

     I've shared many of my findings and "Lil'thoughts" on pain in one form or another through my writing...for there are many forms with which pain takes to enter Ones Life.  Some are known as our "Shadow Self", some are known as our "Demons", some come through the form of a Loved One, some come through in the form of "Dis-Ease" of the Mind, Body or Spirit...or All of the above which =Chaos....not Peace.

     Many folks run from Pain....Fear takes over, anger takes over, anxiety sets in and One makes one of 2 choices at that point....Embrace It...or Ignore It.

     I'm going to be posting on here an OutLine for a Discussion that I put together on the topic of Pain. I am also going to be posting some of the thoughts that ran through my mind and continue to on the topic. For this is just another aspect of Our Human experience that we must learn to Walk Through, Experience, Embrace and Take a Dance with from time to time. And it is just as much of a Representative of Love and everything else....so there is no better time than the Present...to Learn to Dance with Pain.

I hope You enjoy my thoughts on the subject!

~In Peace,Love & Service Of~

           

Discussion OutLine

 
Pain: "Emotional, Mental & Physical Pain
and The Transformation of the various pains into Positive/Pleasure & Service"
 
 

Pain is caused by a difference in acting forces within either:

  • your emotional body - astral body
  • your mental body
  • your innermost/spiritual self
  • your physical body - manifesting above mentioned pains if left undealt with.
 
 
 
1) Types of Pain and "definition" thereof
 
(These are just the "definitions" of such in the forms which i will be referring to for the purpose of this particular discussion. Not an "official" definition of such terms, by any means)
 
a) Emotional Pain:
 
 **Usually caused by a separation of some sort. Either the loss or separation of a relationship or an aspect of a relationship, either with self or another person.
(ie: abandonment, traumatic experience of some kind)
 
 **A form of pain that one works through in order to process the "loss of" phase in either a relationship or aspect of self.
 
** Can manifest in forms of anger, anxiety, fear, depression
 
**Some people can continue to experience emotional pain to the extent that they try to avoid or escape the real emotional pain connected with the original traumas. It is as though the person has been wounded, but the wounds have not been allowed to properly heal. Rather they have been covered up with drug and alcohol abuse, misplaced rage and aggression, various forms of self-destructive behavior, or denial and repression. All of these can be used as attempts to avoid facing the original fear, hurt, shame, guilt, or feelings of worthlessness.
 
 
b) Mental Pain:
 
**Mental pain alerts us to the state of our thinking. As a general rule, when our thinking becomes self-centered or anxious, mental pain will occur.
 
**Actions of negative/ill intent cause pain for everyone, the difference is the length of time that it takes one to feel this pain. The higher we resonate, the faster & more intense we feel the pain. (This can also mean we identify it quicker, to resolve it quicker.)
 
**The fact is that millions of people experience mental pain, and all mental pain requires compassion to solve the problems at the source of the pain.
 
**The most widely spread myth of the origin of mental pain is that mental pain has a "mental cause". (ie: "mental illness") 
 
 
c) Physical Pain:
 
**Physical pain often manifests from Emotional, Mental or Spiritual Pain that is not dealt with properly or that is avoided. The longer one avoids dealing with or facing the core self issues, the worse the physical manifestation of the "Dis-Ease" within self can become apparant.
 
**There are certain energy points within the body that can give us warning signs that we are either avoiding an issue or not aware of the fact that an issue even exists. (on a subconscious level. Through learning of these points and paying attention to the physical pain and where our bodies are experiencing pain, one can have a better idea of where to look within.
 
 
 
2) The positive side of Pain
 
 
a) The positive side of Emotional Pain:
 
**One learns how to take care of self when working through and facing what is causing this emotional pain. Through the awareness of such pain, one is getting further in touch and tune with self. By looking at this pain and dealing with it one will be able to find the "pleasure lesson" wrought with Healing & Compassion to serve up to others that either are currently or have had "like experiences".
 
**After having experienced such pain, one then has the awareness that such a pain exists and no longer has to fear this form of pain, they have experienced and overcome it and can now "use it" as a navigational tool for Living by possessing the ability to identify it when it is present.
 
 
b) The positive side of Mental Pain:
 
 
**Just as we should be grateful for physical pain for protecting our bodies, we should also be grateful for mental pain, for providing important signals along our Path.
 
**Pain is essential for a Balanced Self & Life, as unpleasant as it may be, we should always be grateful for the experience of pain as well as pleasure.
 
**Through introspection and experience of mental pain, we can develop our understanding of it and learn to work more effectively with it's presence in our life. Through looking at it and identifying it we can learn how to work with ourself in learning to flow through these times of pain that come our way.
 
 
c) The positive side of Physical Pain:
 
**Again, pain speaks to us, warns us and guides us. Through looking within at the physical pain and the areas it is taking over or representing, we can gain the Knowledge needed to help ourself Heal in mind, body and spirit. Our physical organs hold onto certain emotions..for example: The Liver holds our anger. So if we have old anger issues left that we have not dealt with, we may develop a "dis-eased" liver.  If we repeat time after time that we have a "hole in our heart" from a lost love...through time a "hole in the heart" is exactly what one could very well end up with. The goal is to HEAL the "hole in the heart" so one does not manifest one!
 
**Receiving pain can also be a theraputic route for dealing with and working through some of the Emotional & Mental pains that we need to Heal. In my Own Life/Path, it was through the use of BDSM "Scene play", Safe, negotiated scenes that were set up to work through certain events that once traumatized or injurred the inner self.  There are many forms with which BDSM can be used to help work through the transformation and healing of the old and injurred self.
 
**Pain can also be a "Catalyst" & "Trigger" for issues that need to be faced and walked through and should not be ignored when struck deeply. Pain serves as another form of a Mirror to Self. When it hits...one needs to stop and look into it as deeply as needs to be looked into. It is a Blessing in disguise, but only in disguise if we continue to fear & avoid it....rather than be Thankful for it's existence and the Wisdom and Knowledge of Self that it can offer us, if given the chance.
 
 
 
Quotes:

"The pain - or "broken heart" - ends when you have learned all your lessons from your very own mistakes made, when you truly and fully understand the reason or need to part." ~author unknown~

 Embrace the Darkness...
That which taught me Light.
Embrace the Darkness...
By Day and by Night.
Embrace the Darkness...
And re-birthed i shall be.
By Lights lasting Love
and Earth's Darkly seed.
Embrace the Darkness...
Deaths silent delight.
Embrace the Darkness...
Stand tall in the Night.
Embrace the Darkness...
And slowly emerge.
And from Love's Shadow...
Embrace the urge.

*sacryfice*

2006 

Pain/Punishment

 

 

12-20-2007

 

i got to thinking tonight about how often pain is viewed as a punishment in folks’ eyes. If one is experiencing a difficult time/period, if one loses a loved one, if one gets physically injurred in some way. Be it physical or emotional or mental or spiritual pain….it is most likely viewed as some form of “punishment” for something we have done wrong in our life. Either we were a “bad person” in a past life, or we did something bad at some other time in our life or we walked wrong so we fell and got hurt…the list goes on, but i’m sure you get my point.

i used to have the same perception….but anymore, i know that a period of pain or suffering of some form, usually means i am learning a lesson, clearing house, excavating old hurts and that i will feel “lighter” when this passes.

i’m also one that embraces physical pain…for me, it CAN be very theraputic for me to take part in recieving physcial pain and the kicking and fighting to work through and release some pent up energies. Recieving physical pain can help deal with other things going on in my life…it can work for one in many ways. It works good for me when i am beating myself up for something. If my Keeper punishes me, then it is much easier for me to let go and move on from whatever it is. If i don’t feel as though i am properly punished for something, i can spen eons kicking my own butt!! So also a punishment enables me to better “let go” of something.

     Pain is a funny thing….if one would really just sit down, open your mind and allow yourself to take a look at it….it is really quite a beautiful gift that one can find much….much pleasure in….*ss*

 

 

On Crying

December 2007

To further in this discussion and the thought of crying....

Crying is a very cleansing and healing act for us. i personally have learned to embrace crying as a very important aspect of "taking care of me" with the healing path that i've been on and the energy work that i do. As well as, allowing the free flow of tears through a scene, not having someone tell you to stop crying, or to stuff your feelings....but having someone embrace and love your tears because they know that you are freely expressing yourself to them.

This has been an especially important part of my own Healing Path with my Keeper. With my abusive past i was often told to shut up, to stop my "blubbering" and other such stuff. So for me, having the freedom to cry and having someone kiss away my tears or wipe away my tears or care enough to know why i am crying and work through the tears with me means the world to me! And now...i cry when it feels GOOD too!! i shed tears when i feel Love, i shed tears when i feel Joy, i shed tears for myriad reasons now...not just when i am hurting or scared or feeling something negative...i experience positive tears as well.

Without working through the fear of crying, the negative perceptions of crying, we cannot embrace all aspect and benefits of such a cleansing act and function of our bodies and self. Crying is a gift, not only a gift to the Dominants...but a gift to self as well.

~May we all learn to relish in our tears~

 

 Fallen Angel learn to fly
You have the power to go so high.
Soar beyond the Moon & Stars
Leave behind the ugly scars.
When you don’t believe, life is so mundane
And all you feel is misery and pain.
Fallen Angel, spread your wings~
And dance all night as the Faeries sing.

~L~ 

 

   © 02-01-01

What is Pain?

Really….what is pain anyway? i mean…i’ve been taking a good, deep, hard look at pain and ways/forms of dealing with it for approximately 8 yrs now. Many of my writings are how to deal with or shift the perceptions of pain in one way or another, which…yah, that also makes a very good “fit” with my “name”…and i feel is a big part of my Being here and doing what i do.

With my personal life path that i have chosen of BDSM & D/s, M/s….again, a great avenue for such a mind as mine.  It enables me to have the EXPERIENCE of several different aspects of Pain which then i can take and look at and feel into to learn from and transform into Healing, Compassion and putting the “positive twist” in Pain. With this “positive twist” we can break down & through the barriors and veils and secrets that keep so many locked in a shroud of shame that pain often keeps us locked in, and enable them the freedom to embrace, accept and LOVE the “shamed self” as well as the “invoker of pain”….be it Self or Other.

It is rare that people can grasp the concept of Pain being another aspect of LOVE. Learning the Love of Pain…or the Pain of Love…both are difficult…either way you look at it. But again…really…what IS Pain?? What is there to fear in it anymore than there is to fear in Love? What IS the real difference in the 2? Or in Pain & Pleasure for that matter? LOVE ItSelf can be either Painful or Pleasurable. It can be a “negative or positive” experience. So Pain is no less of a representative of Love than Pleasure is!!

From there it would do us good to also look at the “invoker of pain”.  Usually, (but not always), we view pain as coming from somewhere…either from the “hands” of an-Other, or from the “mouth” of an-Other, or from the loss of an-Other. Are these “Others” the actual givers of pain or are they in charge of making sure the land-mine gets stepped on? Actually, it goes either way i think, but in the fullest color of Truth…the pain itself still is coming from the direct connection of self and ones own perception of each particluar situation that is the cause/trigger of the “Pain-filled Experience”.

But the “invokers of pain” have Their own demons to deal with as well. The finger gets pointed at them an awfully lot!! They get cussed out, blamed, guilted and shamed for causing this horrid pain or traumatic event or re-memberance. They also have to step back and take a good hard look at Self and what “they have done” or how “they have acted/re-acted” in this event, what role they too played in this Pain-filled situation.  It is no more fun being the “invoker of pain” than it is being the “reciever of pain”…Both have much to look at and learn in Self from Dancing with Pain.

By the Invoker shifting perceptions on Pain, it can very well be viewed at “teaching a lesson”. Which again, goes WAY back!!! “I’m going to teach you a lesson!!” often comes out of a parents mouth just before a spanking is to be given! Pain IS a lesson…it just doesn’t have to hurt so deeply and everywhere and be viewed as this horrid and negative experience with which we avoid in life! We spend a lot of time trying to AVOID this experience that is inevitably going to play out and happen at some point anyway…so we might as well roll with the punches, learn our lesson, take our spankings…remember to say “Thank You”…and move on!

Back to the Invoker of Pain though. Another saying that goes WAY back is…”This is going to hurt me more than it is going to hurt you!” Often times this IS the Truth. The Invoker is just as hurt, if not moreso, than the reciever. When pain is “given” out of anger, it is “given” out of Pain really. Anger is just Pain showing in another color. When Pain is given out of jealousy, it is given out of Pain. Jealousy, again, is just Pain showing in another color. You get the picture…yes? 

So again…LOVE. If we just step back and take a look at the big picture of Pain….It is another Color of Love…or another Rainbow of Colors of Love actually. No “good or bad”….No “positive or negative”….No “light or dark”…..but a Rainbow of Love…just like ALL Other forms with which IT manifests for Us to experience the sensation of.

I'm falling awake in the daylight of night,

I'm falling awake, what a painful delight.

As Above, So Below,

I fly as I fall...

Through the dark and the light,

I walk as I crawl...

I'm falling awake in the night light of day,

I'm falling awake and Love lights my way.

~L~ 

2007

 

"Softening" Pain

January 4th, 2008
 
 

In my continued thoughts on pain, i am led back to the memory of a quote that i read where someone was telling another that “pain softens them”. This of course made me stop and go “hhmmmm….” and i could see myself in that statement also. i know that pain also softens me…at times it is soothing for me….at times it is a comfort for me….at times it is my best friend. And it is various forms of pain that serve me in various ways at various moments in my life.
i believe in the instance of this particular quote…He was referring to the fact that she had “softened” after her spanking. Well yes!! Of course one softens after a spanking….(if one is within my particular lifestyle anyway). But yes, when i am “out of control of myself” and my Keeper steps in to “put me back into my place/space”…it could very well be put into the terms of “to soften me”…and i LOVE the head-space that it puts me in and the way that it makes me feel. It balances me.
Then there are just that days that come along that one just wants to sit in their own “pool of self pity” and FEEL the pain damnit!!! Sometimes it is what comforts us!! Nothing at all wrong with that…doesn’t mean you’re “ill” or anything of the kind…it is simply a sensation that you wish to experience today…just like any other. And yes…days like that also have a way of “softening” us…putting us in our place/space….they can be very soothing and cleansing.
The experience of losing a loved one…one of the worst pains we experience…can also “soften” us. One can go either way with pain. We can allow it to “Harden” us or “Soften” us. It can harden or soften the Heart…it’s all in Ones perception and all in how One handles the pain or chooses to work through it..or not. But if one chooses to work through it, to work WITH pain, rather than AGAINST pain….become ONE with pain, rather than try to stay separate from pain…then One can experience the “softening” of pain.

If we allow pain to soften us, this is also where we gain compassion for others. Having embraced our painful experiences and allowing ourself to Love through the experiences, we can then Love others and embrace them through theirs as well. Had we allowed pain to harden us, we would just push further away from others and from compassion for others, for fear of “being hurt” and having to face pain once again.  But if we embrace pain, work with it and become one with it, then there is nothing to “fear” in pain…but allowing another form of LOVE into your Heart!

Another way with which it benefits to allow pain to soften, is we are then able to walk through life with the awareness of what certain “pains” feel like and we do what we can to not bring this form of pain on to another Being, if it is something that is within our control. In observing such pains and being aware of some of the “causes” of pain that one might not otherwise think of, we then learn of what we can do to help invoke less pain into/onto another. For example we learn to be more aware of the Tone of our Voice, or of the weight words can bring to a person, or of the value of ones word or lack thereof. There are numerous ways one can benefit from the lessons of Pain and allowing it to soften our Hearts, rather than hardening them.

If one really thinks about it…if one could just shift their perception of “pain”….how much negativity would that wipe out in ones life? “Negative experiences” are mostly based from “painfull experiences”….are they not? So if one learns to work with and through and embrace the pain in ones life….and see the painful experience as a lesson or a purging or some positive…rather than a “harsh punishment” of some form…then i would say that would make a very good dent in the amount of “negativity” percieved in Ones life as well as “softening the blows” when they do come knocking around us.

 

Lily lost, Lily lost cry no more,

Lily lost, Lily lost come to shore~

Come with me and follow my lead~

Come with me and we’ll plant some seeds~

Some seeds of Faith and Love and Trust~

Some seeds that wont tarnish, ruin or rust~

Come with me and we’ll plant a garden~

Of soft pretty flowers that will never harden~

They wont harden or crack or ever go away~

And in that garden you can come and play~

So come ashore and take my hand~

Lily lost, Lily lost, stay in my land.

~L~ 

 

©2002